Blessed abundantly was a phrase that I have heard so much as a little kid. I would never forget singing the song that says, "that life abundantly"...as I would turn and shake my butt because of course the song had motions. I also understand that what I described may seem strange to you if you have never heard the song... but for those of you who have...you understand. As a kid I loved this song... but I never really understood the words... I actually thought it was amazing that I got to shake my butt in church and no adult told me I was going to go to hell for shakin it fast. As I got older I started to understand that abundantly didn't mean if you got a butt ...shake it in church...instead I started to learn that abundantly was a blessing.. well and so is a booty to shake... Now that I am at the stage in my life that I am at abundantly has taken a whole new meaning...
I often look at my life and say, "self...you are one blessed woman..crazy to think that the Lord wants to give you more." I often wonder what I have done to deserve so many blessings in my life...and it all comes down to obedience...and yet again in my journey of life I share with you now...a testimony of obedience.
Many months ago I started feeling discouraged and really was at the point where I wanted to pull away from my ministry and everything it involved. Little did I know that in those moments of discouragement Jesus was working something out (isn't he always at work)...I continued to pray for guidance and direction.. knowing that my heart wasn't fully with one part of my job. For those of you who know me well..you will know that if my heart isn't fully in the ministry that I am involved in...I will choose to not be a part of a half heart job. As you can imagine this was very frustrating to me. See I was hired for my job to actually do two jobs...one was working with mommies and their babies...the other was to work with the maternity home. Well long story short... my heart was being pulled away from the mommies and their babies. Don't get me wrong...I love those girls and the little lives that they brought into this world...but I couldn't continue with them and feel that I was giving them the things that they needed. After a series of events my boss called me one day and asked me how I would feel about working full time in the maternity home. He had no idea that I had secretly been praying this that would happen. Now here I am as the Head Houseparent for the maternity home (The Royal Home)...I praise God for this blessing. Along with this blessing comes many more challenges but along the way the Lord is teaching me. At the age of 28 and with no husband I feel so inadequate to lead these girls but I push on.
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
A Little Lighter...
So many times I have heard the phrase, "you are what you eat" but I have never really truly understood what it really meant..until recently.
All of my life I have battled with being food healthy and in High School I was diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Those who have been told that they have this same thing will understand the difficulties of having it. The doctors continued to change my medications...which literally led to messy situations. They finally gave up and basically said, "we don't really know what is going on." Oh good I thought...this is what we pay you for?... So needless to say I learned to deal with the constant pain and for lack of better words...constipation. No joke...before going on trips my family would have to wait for me in the car for about 40 minutes so I could try to do my business. Many of my youth days...when our youth group would go on trips... I would find myself in a gas station bathroom...and the whole van load of crazy teens waiting on me. This became a way of life..and I tolerated it. I have tolerated it so much that about 2 years ago I started to develop a pain in my stomach. This pain continued to get worse... and it started to hurt when I would lay on my stomach. I continued to tell myself it was nothing until about a little over a month ago. I needed to move a microwave from one side of the kitchen...well when I went to lift it... I kneeled over in so much pain I could barely stand straight up. I finally decided that it was time to go to a doctor. Little did I know that I would soon find out I was allergic to food... literally! It was the end of the world as I sat in the doctors office as she named the food: corn, grains, rice, yeast, wheat, egg whites (moderately allergic. The next sentence was the worst... "I am putting you on the GAPS diet." Oh dear LORD... I thought... What is this crazy diet... I mean really The GAPS diet?... Well it was exactly what I didn't want to hear.. You can't have potatoes, bread, pasta, cookies, cake...HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE?!!! There goes my Little Debbies, pizza... SUSHI...SWEET SUSHI!!! I thought my life was over... but little did I know...my life had just began.
*Confession #1:... I am a survivor... of what you ask...well this little bit of information that I am about to give to you was something that took me days to mentally process...I honestly could not believe for one minute what the doctor said to me... You have parasites! EXCUSE ME... come again?! Listen to me... I am not a garden... gardens have parasites... I am a human being for goodness sakes! After I let the shock of this horrible news soak in my doctor gave me some stuff to kill the parasites. I am proud to announce that all of my parasites will be gone soon! And well yes... they are being passed through well... we don't need to go any further.
*Confession #2:...This confession is kind of an embarrassment to me because it is unbelievingly crazy how far I had really let myself go. All my life I feel like I have served others and I am grateful that God has allowed me to do this but in the long run... I have failed to take care of myself. I started coming to the realization that how can I fully care for someone when I can't totally care for myself. As of January 21, 2013 I weighed in at 205lbs. It startled me to see that number on the scale... I can't believe that I have allowed myself to get to that point. With discouragement comes encouragement and as of today February 12, 2013 I weigh 190 lbs. In less than a month I have dropped 15 lbs!
All of my life I have battled with being food healthy and in High School I was diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Those who have been told that they have this same thing will understand the difficulties of having it. The doctors continued to change my medications...which literally led to messy situations. They finally gave up and basically said, "we don't really know what is going on." Oh good I thought...this is what we pay you for?... So needless to say I learned to deal with the constant pain and for lack of better words...constipation. No joke...before going on trips my family would have to wait for me in the car for about 40 minutes so I could try to do my business. Many of my youth days...when our youth group would go on trips... I would find myself in a gas station bathroom...and the whole van load of crazy teens waiting on me. This became a way of life..and I tolerated it. I have tolerated it so much that about 2 years ago I started to develop a pain in my stomach. This pain continued to get worse... and it started to hurt when I would lay on my stomach. I continued to tell myself it was nothing until about a little over a month ago. I needed to move a microwave from one side of the kitchen...well when I went to lift it... I kneeled over in so much pain I could barely stand straight up. I finally decided that it was time to go to a doctor. Little did I know that I would soon find out I was allergic to food... literally! It was the end of the world as I sat in the doctors office as she named the food: corn, grains, rice, yeast, wheat, egg whites (moderately allergic. The next sentence was the worst... "I am putting you on the GAPS diet." Oh dear LORD... I thought... What is this crazy diet... I mean really The GAPS diet?... Well it was exactly what I didn't want to hear.. You can't have potatoes, bread, pasta, cookies, cake...HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE?!!! There goes my Little Debbies, pizza... SUSHI...SWEET SUSHI!!! I thought my life was over... but little did I know...my life had just began.
*Confession #1:... I am a survivor... of what you ask...well this little bit of information that I am about to give to you was something that took me days to mentally process...I honestly could not believe for one minute what the doctor said to me... You have parasites! EXCUSE ME... come again?! Listen to me... I am not a garden... gardens have parasites... I am a human being for goodness sakes! After I let the shock of this horrible news soak in my doctor gave me some stuff to kill the parasites. I am proud to announce that all of my parasites will be gone soon! And well yes... they are being passed through well... we don't need to go any further.
*Confession #2:...This confession is kind of an embarrassment to me because it is unbelievingly crazy how far I had really let myself go. All my life I feel like I have served others and I am grateful that God has allowed me to do this but in the long run... I have failed to take care of myself. I started coming to the realization that how can I fully care for someone when I can't totally care for myself. As of January 21, 2013 I weighed in at 205lbs. It startled me to see that number on the scale... I can't believe that I have allowed myself to get to that point. With discouragement comes encouragement and as of today February 12, 2013 I weigh 190 lbs. In less than a month I have dropped 15 lbs!
This goes on to say...as I was saying earlier you are what you eat. It was nothing for me to run to a local fast food joint to grab something quick for dinner. I was literally eating myself to death. My body has been made up of nothing but garbage. I am starting to feel whole...and the best part is that I have no more pain in my gut. I am starting to feel better about myself and about my life. I continue to pray that I can stay focused and be self disciplined!
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